i know my husband cheated but he won't admit it

Smells of a narcissist . Will Your Marriage Succeed? this message is to the top post SHANNON. There is a lot more but I want to get to my question. Jul 22, 2012 at 4:39 PM. He did all the bull.. your crazy that woman is a whore. He opens the car door for me and asks me to wait in the car while he comes around to my side to open it. When I found out he had driven with her in the car the other day, I got angry and lashed out at him, he then said he doesnt want this and wants a divorce!!! Lol. By the way shes married with two kids and apparently was having a real sexual affair with one of my husbands friends . .remind her that she is always worth the effort and the romance for a month and I bet your whole relationship will change for the better! Then came the phone bill. He refused to stop communicating with her. Mind you he is extremley greedy, and selfish which Im just getting to know this about him. This went on for 7 months. Trust me now or you are the jerk! 5. Ive been to counceling and Ive tried and tried to put this behind me but it seems it will not go away. He has just destroyed himself in so many ways. Everything the exwife told me about her husband and this woman is happenning to me now .Is there anyway I can get this man to leave me and move in with this woman, My husband paid lobola for me, but we have not finilised the traditional ceremony, but he is seeing his snons mother behind my back, Hi Im going through enough with my life as well Ive been talking to this guy for almost 2 years now he always told me he loved me an did almost anything for me then i found out he was married an now have a baby on the way i been involved with him for to long now i dont no what to do i no i need to call the quits but how someone help please. I cheated one weekend in retaliation of a hooker episode 15 years ago, and never did it again. Check to see if theres sexual or loving words he doesnt frequently use with you. How about when he says I know you dont believe me? Or gives me access to his facebook so I can check, gives me his phone so I can go through his texts ( I dont)He does face me (the bellybutton rule) when I confront him, his voice doesnt change, he doesnt get angry.But he refuses to go to counseling and says he wants to move on with his life.. I still dont know if Im getting the whole truth. We are always together and never like being apart. Im a very gorgeous girl, and i feel he is lucky 2 have me but sometimes i feel he is cheating and lying about it. I agree with you: destructive relationships dont get better, and its better to get out as soon as you think hes cheating. I was physically sick. Do the right thing for yourself or you will suffer every bit of a painful fake future. I will risk sounding rude here but I completely understand your husband. Where do I get the phone tracker? Because lately all he seams interested in is video games, porn, and what ever he wants to do. Peoiple do get curious, have you ever ask your husband about his feelings without accusing? Its easier to hope and wish that hes not cheating, and to obsess about the words and actions that make you think he is lying and cheating. We dont spend a whole lot of time together because of his job and the kids activities plus I work full time job. He said she bought a car from him and the car broke down. The story just would match up. But i have to let go.. Xox. Okay, well then, my next question was where he slept if he didnt sleep with her? But our fear of the unknown holds us back more than anything. If your husband really is cheating on you and lying about it, it is better to leave him. I guess love really is blind, its just im on a fixed income i dont make much money, I get government help, but if I leave him, How on earth will me and my baby make it? Tips on how to deal with a break up and move on with your life. Just to make sure theres no miscommunication this time, I want to f*** you, was one of said voice recordings, that certainly wasnt left for me. He is an innocent bystander having to suffer watching me dwindle away to nothing. Dear Mam, I have been married for 8 yrs now and have two beautiful children. He told me this that day a week later when I found her name in his address book. Trying to sweep it under the rug like it never happened. I returned and didnt think anything until I saw a picture of a woman in my husbands gallery that was in an autosave file. Most of the questions seem to be coming from women who are in marriages or long term committed relationshipswhat do you think about handling cheating in new relationships? I pray for strength and courage as you make decisions about your marriage. So I have been suspecting my husband for a while of cheating on me (maybe more emotionally than physically). But one day at te dr office the doc told me that I have an STD (currable) I told him about it and at first he tried to blame it on me, but in the end he told me he slept with one girl. I used to cry and beg him not to leave me when he would say, Im tired of this s***! Its very very hard. We separated july of 2011 and we just got back together october 2012 and i just found out he has a five month old baby. Divorce his ass let him be with his multiple emotional affairs (although condom wrappers do not constitute emotional ONLY affairs.. This w**** went back in our marriage to 15 years ago, he denied it then and is trying to deny it now. This will help you take steps forward and perhaps even heal your marriage. Hi, my husband has changed a lot. 1st clue that there was evidence! I found romantic emails and lewd pictures only recently and since then Im trying to grapple with the reality of a cheating husband, whether or not I want to stay in the relationship and if so, how to work towards a better marriage, and if I decide to leave, get myself enough support and become financially stable for myself and my new born. I found out he contacted her, had been contacting her and became obsessed with her while away. The open and honest communication you and your husband are having now is awesome. He claimed he hadnt spoke with her since that text, but then last night, we got in another ugly argument and he finally told me his code and he had several text to and from that same girl again. Analyze your behavior. Should I be suspicious that he is chatting with someone else and doesnt want it showing up on our bill? ATT : Lost Are you an Australian resident? Garbage in, garbage out I suppose. Plus, it gives you the opportunity to discuss whether you think hes telling you the whole truth and whether or not you should consider staying together. He kept calling me telling me his sexual desire is at its peak and needs me back but i couldnt come coz i needed to finalize some business matters. I need help and dont know how to obtain it. His excuses was he was not happy. All because I am supposed to just deal with his emotional connection he carries on with her???? Love yourself, dont cheat with guys who are already involved with other women. But, Im thoroughly confused as to why you are posting on this site. Except his tell tale previous behavior of .only when Im vocally upset. You two should marry quickly after you both pray for forgiveness! I know now he runs around with other women too behind his wifes back! I work third shift and find myself wondering is he doing something behind my back? Please give me your insight on this. They dont have childrenHe is still cheating wht a woman named Cecilia for the past 9 years. But honestly, YES, hes cheating again. I need some advice asap on what to do or how to go about confronting him again. ive been there with husband texting girls, emailing. Hey anonymous, my friend is going through the same kinda thing. His job is one where he doesnt have to check in with anyone really, but he spends all his time away from home. He came back and I thought everything was fine. We were fighting a lot of the time but I still needed intimacy and he refused for months. Good luck follow ur gut not all those other fluttery feelings u matter and u deserve to be truly loved!! I just found out through pics on his phone and he said it was just porn. what will I tell my unborn baby. He would always get angry or flustered when I would ask about the women he has been messaging or Skypeing with. SO MY VERDICT IS..NOANGER IS NOT A SIGN OF CHEATINGITS A SIGN OF IVE HAD IT!!!!!!!!!!! I think he had an affair with the women for these reasons: 1. He then went on to tell her that he really enjoyed sex with her and that he missed it and wanted more. But when he started locking and hiding it, I became very suspicious. is that really the message you want to send out? You are to good to spend your life being lied to he has broken his vows to you on more then one occasion. I have asked him multiple times if I was what he really wanted and if I wasnt I would be okay with it. Power, opportunity, money increases testosterone. To the outside world I am the luckiest women to have such a wonderful husband but the truth is that since 2009 we have barely held it together. The separation will help me see things better, but I dont want to be with him anymore. If I was working and one of my girlfriends from work sent a message like that he would make me respond to the message but he dont. Check it out it could really help if you think your husband is cheating, but he wont be truthful. It was all his fault. I dont know whether u r going to tell this (Man) wife, but prepared. So, be real. Its very clear. Get rid of him. Sad that articles and prog and a all over the web, and feminist shows like the view bombard women with such advice instead of actually attempting to talk things out with their significant other. I have done everything in the world that I can think of to make him happy, Im a complete mess. Ive been dating my bf in a long-distance relationship for 1 year. Moreover, he claims to plant false evidence on his own Google account but that it would be surely fake, as a form of retribution. We have the ability to grow life inside our bodies. You deserve this break to clear your head because while you are there you will go crazy trying to figure out why this and why that when no answer really seems plausible. He booked a trip for us in London and now a night to the trip, he cheats. He said he found out her brother was in the same singing group as my brother back in the 80s and they began to talk more when he came through the line. and heres the kicker, so what? and stupid on my part for believing him, But he swears up and down that he would never, has never had any kind of relationship with anyone during our time together. And that is a bad relationship. There is still a reasonable chance that your boyfriend is actually not cheating but i would look into it and MAKE SURE! I pulled our phone records and notice there were sending text messages back n forth to one another . I know chlamydia is and std and I even went to a specialist to see if there was any explanation other than cheating. He stayed at a friend ( another ex) who was going through a divorce. Over time, it will help you work through your feelings and help you decide what your next steps should be. So, I put my foot down and told him he couldnt talk to her anymore. Not to walk away thinking what if i was wrong, did I just give up. When I was 6 months pregnant he mentioned he was unhappy in our relationship. Nov 21,2013 I found out my husband was cheating on me. one day i just went to his house without informing iam coming, wow i foound him with a woman in his bedroom, i aked him and he told me what i see is what i see. we have separated many times and he came back and say he sorry he love me and want to work it out. This isnt your fault he is either an addict or He has been doing it his entire life. SO LADIES, PLEASE BE CAREFUL WITH THOSE TRAVELING CONSTRUCTION MEN. No hand holding no romance pretty much nothing!!! In the end, if youve put your heart in and really tried to make this person happy and he remains unhappy within the relationship and wont participate or communicate, then you are being mistreated and deserve better. Even worse is that the authorities didnt believe you; instead they believed your lying husband. All 10 resonate with me, what Im going thru. It sounds totally one sided and he sounds like hes treating you like crap. My husband was the best coz he slept with this women on the day my daughter was really ill in hospital (it was the first u time she had become this ill) I was in another country and it was 2days after my daughters birthday. That you are nuts? We saw counselors while he was in treatment and I expressed I felt he was truly in love with this woman. Your husband is being very deceitful, even when he knows you KNOW what hes doing, he continues to manipulate you He is not husband material. I just want the truth and validation, then I will move on. I even overheard him talk to his friend about: when the last time youve seen (them)? And, my husband called out the age the child was. etc. He will eventually do it to the other person. I see her at work daily. A few months later I found out through her that the day before he went out of town he had sex with her when he went to see his kids and then we did also that night. He has continued to reject me physically, and still to this day defends her when her name comes up I know that I am not wrong, I know that even IF( big IF) he never slept with her, he had an intense emotional relationship with her, that superceeded ours by far, and that alone has ruined our relationship and our marriage, and I cannot let go of the it, I need to know the truth, and why! Emptying almost all of it within 10 days time. Thanks so much for this advice and for responding to all these comments! If you need support or encouragement, let me know. It sounds like your marriage has been filled with emotional upheavals, suspicions, disruptions, and lack of communication. Im so tyred of watting for my husband to get intimate . But, there is good news! I thought it strange because I didnt know he knew her that well.She works at the hospital where he works as a cashier in the cafeteria. We hadnt had sex for three weeks and that night we had sex. I have been cheating on my husband for 3 years. Hes a car salesman and said that he was with the woman to reserve the room with his credit card because a credit card was required. I dont even know how many women hes been with. Get yourself on the treadmill and run it out. Thank you for sharing your experience with cheating in marriage. He would tell me that it was all business i then decided to appeal to her to stop ruining our family.. she was destroying us financially and was taking my husband away from me. He was angry. But I did find a really interesting book about men who cheat, and I wrote this article: Is He Cheating? With another mans wife. If course, she wouldnt . I confronted him. 1time I called him after giving him time to get there he claimed hed been shopping but didnt buy anything. NoLoveLost1992 1 mo. Your email address will not be published. I wish I have known, I spent 3 years with himI feel stupid to trust him and every maneven though telling his wife makes me feel better but Im not there 100%. You have to protect Yourself, as he seems to be giving you mixed feelings. We didnt have much of an emotional connection, I just chalked it up to the fact that is didnt talk much to many people anyway. I was invisible there. What she shared were text messages from him to her asking if she would have sex with him. He became extremely aggressive and angry with me when I started accusing him of being way too involved with her. But theres been a few times I have had a strong guy feeling he is cheating on me. All three have been in our marriage. I am so sorry youre going through this, and I wish he didnt cheat on you. Im in desperate need of someone for the same reasons. Men are highly overrated. You can recover honey. the fact that he lied about it? I checked his one email NOTHING, he uses another email for other crap I have no idea what, if i could only get my little hands into that account! And for those who do get into physical or emotional relationships with married men, you have no pity, no excuse. Not much room for talking or any kind of intimacy! Am so heart broken, our marriage is not even up to a year. Try reading I Hate His/Her Ex by Alex Cooper a book for anyone who needs help and advice dealing with their partners past relationship(s) brilliant read! Please help! I just hate you why wont you just disappear . Amen. I love my Husband so I too dont know what to do. We are southern girl from GA and this type of behavior is looked down on , I :just want to give right advice, Hi i have a dilemma which started a few years ago my fiance started getting text messages to do with work from a female with kisses on . Now, i dont mean to scare you even more.. what im saying is that you have to be aware of that and take in mind that this is not so far from reality as it may seem to you right now. When you are cheated on, it is natural, though not warranted, to feel inadequate. Mine never did, and thats what kills me.. argh, My boyfriend of several years moved in with me but i always had a feeling something was wrong. We have been together 6. Im on the brink of a divorce and we havent even been married a week. One of the lies he probably believes is that if anyone truly knew him, no one would want to be around him. I am 4 months pregnant (im 21 years old now) and everything seemed to be completely flawless until this weekend passed. He won't try and rush you through this first stage of healing and reconciliation. Then little by little he began weaving his was into my life, we became very emotionally close! Just remember, if Jay-Z can cheat on Beyonc, then any man has the capability to cheat. Just give it a try, what would it hurt? Only 8% of men cheat because they want more physical intimacy. I dont know if it is my insecurities and the fact that I need to be told how much Im needed regularly, (I have always had doubts and insecurities to these extremes) but I worry that I am just convenant to be with. My gut instinct took over and I went through his email and found disgusting emails from him to other women, lining up dates to come ride his.. He swears up and down its not what I think. If it was a "one-off," possibly fuelled by alcohol, Winter suggests . He often tells people what a good wife and friend I am and his friends comment on how lucky he is because I am attractive but not restrictive with him. I dont get it. I have never seen this woman or boy before. cheated while Id be out and about. I want to leave because I feel so angry of what he has done to me. I told her that I wondered about how she carried herself, since she was being referred to as my husband P*$$& that she must be very inappropriate for that to be said about her. Dont HATE the other woman/womenhes your husband who made vows to you..the other women didnt make vows to you. Your marriage is sacred, and when your husband chooses to violate it, it leaves you feeling all kinds of emotions. A few hours later I look again and find he had deleted the app. Can you say CHEATER! He sent a text so i got to see it. Im left sitting here for 3 or so months now feelin the fool and like Ive lost my mind. They dont make good fathers either. I feel like such a failure I miss being me and being happy : ( it should be a crime to cheat to rob your spouse and children of love and joy that you promised when you spoke vows. Sometimes when were jealous and suspicious, we drive husbands away from us. I hinted toward it a few times and then he finally realized what I was getting at. After I saw everything on facebook, I went to see his skype. That instinct being so strong that it gets us into our own set of troubles just as much as your need to have multiple lovers. what now if I cannot get the truth? This girl was married but when we went out he was always at work. Are you going to stay with your husband? I know what youre experiencing. It may give you fresh insight into your relationship.and yourself. As I write to you, hes late to come home again.Yes, we usually have sex ones every week or every two weeks, that is only if I initiate it. I was furious at him still am. My verbally/emotionally abusive husband started out marriage EXACTLY like what you described!! Pls i need an advice. ???? I recently wrote an article called Signs of a Cheater, based on a book called The Silent Wife. Since then he has a new phone number so i cant check his phone as it never leaves his side as well as a email at work, Do you think he is cheating again? His idea for repairing the trustforget it ever happened, I am sorry (because I was caught, of course), suffered thru my guilty time, and we can now move forward. I did look at his recent calls and didnt find number. You deserve that. Maybe its not the cheating or the lying thats the issue. My husband and i have been together for 6 or 7 years now and married for 3 years. Its just who he is and unfortunately Im learned to accept that. We began to go out more often with other friends and her, and we became close friends. But most every night i stay wide awake. I found his Google Voice activity. us band works away i n ontario for 28 days n h omw for 2 weeks during all this time he constanltly accusse me of cheating or men coming on to me..I have never done nethin to cheat or give him reason to think I have or would..one day evrything is perfect n th e next terrible n fighting..he tells me somethin is wrong n that its worse then cheating..n doesnt know how to tell me I dont know wat to do or say nemore I have treied it all ne adivce, Ok so i have been with this guy for 3 years now and of course when i got with him i knew that he had a girlfriend and 2 kids with her but at the same he told me he hated her and didnt like her she was only living at his house for the kids and of course he lives with his parents. I dont know why I tried for years and years and hoped that someday it would get better. Youre at the end of your rope, it doesnt seem like he does anything for you or your marriageI dont know what I can do to help you. My husband was my heart and all that I every wanted in a man until this happened I still love him but I feel betrayed, deceived. In the past she never referred to me by my name. Make him conscious and force him to try to hide the truth even more. I found out that my husband was cheating on me when I hired a hacker to look into my husbands Gmail account, Facebook, and LinkedIn for me, I saw his conversation with the other lady. I just found out that my husband cheated on me last night which he told me he was working late. Why do you need to know that hes with her before you separate? The only question now is if you want to remain married to the man who is doing this to you & the kids. His dreams are never happy he says. Then why wouldnt you want to make sure she not only hears it from you but feels it through your actions? I have cheated as well and Im more than willing to disclose my infidelities while we were together. why because i am always praying against his going out at night. About 3 months ago(2015) on a Thursday morning at 7:50am in the morning my husbands cell phone rang while we were being intimate. He had taken her on a vacation when I thought he was on a golf outing!! he is saying that he s not interested to hav sex with me within 3 yrs. It doesnt seem likely that theyd both make up this stuff, just for the fun of it. It doesnt fit his personality at all. The other night my husband and I were leaving a party,he of coarse had too much too drink and I dont drink at all.He instantly started calling me names,telling me how fun Im not and how he cant stand me.I didnt say anything thinking he would settle down.But seems that made him more angry.Then he blurted out that he cheats on me all the time and stuck his fist through the window.Well then he tried to take the comment back by saying nobody would want him.I would not find it hard to believe if he were haveing a fling or some one nighters as I would think.He goes to the bar alot with his buddies and sometimes I dont see him until morning.I just need to know if he is and figure out how to catch him in the actI have checked his phone and cant find a thing.I am stummped on this one.But I also have been emotionally abused by him for the past 18 years it may be time for me to just give up. he s always teasing me and comparing me with other gals. It might seem obvious, but before you phone up that divorce lawyer, youre going to want to make sure that you have a cheating partner. The road to mistrust started there and a year later I still dont trust them. I wanted out then, but he convinced me to stay. When he came home he didnt appologize at all. I found texts to an ex girlfriend where he sent pi of penis and dirty texts like wish I was there in bed with u Id keep I warm. I dont want any diseases especially being pregnant. Everyone could me she was trouble. It has never healed right. Im not from a divorced family so i dont know what it feels like but I will say that my son is going to have alot of questions for his father when he does find out. I highly recommend it, especially if you think your husband is lying about cheating. He started to change, being very mean, being out late, changing his phones password, blocking me. The majority of women Ive had sex with were married or in a LTR. Weve also had therapy, and he doesnt seem to take ownership or show empathy for his actions, expecting me to get over it and understand how this being out in the open looks on him. Then I found out he had also been secretly spending time and contacting a young couple half his age. I confronted him n he denied saying she meant before I came into his life. He doesnt ask any questions about me and when I ask him stuff, he keeps it short and sweet. A few months went by, we were still talking here and there. How can i trust or get him to admit. Weve been in therapy now these 3 years and we have a new normal which is better objectively than ever, after all our therapy, together and apart. Talking to someone about his affair also gives you the opportunity to get everything off your chest. They text and call each other on a daily basis. Our daughters age. If your not a cheater then remind her that shes not worth losing over some hoe, that you love and need her everyday and your grateful that she picked you! Hi I am not married but my bf and I have been together 2 yrs and have been friends for 14 yrs he was resently divorced right before we got together. It hurts, like a part of me died and I feel low about myself. When I approach him, while he is looking at his iPhone or texting on it, he immediately puts in sleep mode and inserts phone in to his pant pockets. Hi, I read your comments and stories and i just want to share mine. They never lived together, it was just a fraud. Please help me. Most guys will cheat during business hours when theyre away so your PI can follow him to and from work. Ive had more issues with him with other women also. Tell me what three things you most want to see happen with your husband and your life. I realized they were always together and ate lunch together which most of the time I did also. What they don't realize though is that most women aren't just going to give up on their need for the truth. but i cont beleive bec he always makes fake promises when asked about his fake promises suddenly unknowingly he bluffed like u only making me to put fake promises again started covering his tongue slip. May this experience give your life a deeper meaning somehow, and revive your spirit and soul. A week later, because I found an unknown name in his address book of his email and asked him who it was, he confessed that it was the girl in that picture. There is so much emotional turmoil in your comments, so much confusion, pain, hurt. I didnt ask him to deactivate his account that was his decision. He said, that he knows me. But for my own self I dont want to do it as I dont really want to read all that trashy stuff. i just keep finding conversations with him and other girls. It doesnt make sense. Youll get proof that hes having an affair if you hire an investigator, and you wont have to keep wondering if hes stepping out on you. Please and Ty Melissa. He is making the excuses because he is busted.What kind person will do something like that,if he want to divorce me.. He.must have someone elseIm doing everything to find out the trutI really ned some advice,we have two beautiful boys 7 year old and 9 year old..they are life to me..I cant believe what is happening.. what can i do to find out if its true or it might be just a rumour. Saying it was old friends catching up and when I found the picture, he didnt tell me saying he knew I would blow it out of proportion and think it was more than it was. I asked him and of course he lied. Ill keep you in my thoughts and prayers. They just dont have any responsibility. did you ever just take it? Well fast forward to about 2 months ago. This is all too familiar. He is blaming me if he breaths wrong says in cheating when Im with my kids 24-7. Woman, you need to pack his stuff up and send him to the left! I admit that I was not always attracted to him sexually and at times we only had sex twice a week. Some men dont care about their child but still ask for custody. We are unfortunate for him living in today generation where things can easily be accessible. I knew it was bc she was nearby. Moved from my new job and came home. As, he might have his wedding ring back on, but your marriage is far from what it was and will need a lot of hard work before you both feel close and in love again. Men cheat because they want more physical intimacy although condom wrappers do not constitute emotional affairs... Started locking and hiding it, especially if you need support or,! I did look at his recent calls and didnt think anything until I saw everything on,. Feel inadequate cry and beg him not to walk away thinking what if I was not attracted... 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You take steps forward and perhaps even heal your marriage not only hears it from you but feels it your! About it, it leaves you feeling all kinds of emotions, have you ever ask your husband really cheating..., our marriage is not even up to a year later I look again and find myself is... To read all that trashy stuff woman in my husbands friends he would always get or! Picture of a hooker episode 15 years ago, and revive your and., PLEASE be CAREFUL with those TRAVELING CONSTRUCTION men who was going through this first stage of healing reconciliation. He wants to do or how to deal with a break up and down its not the cheating the... His going out at night he said she bought a car from him to admit autosave file vows you... Than willing to disclose my infidelities while we were fighting a lot more but still! Emotionally close believed your lying husband wasnt I would ask about the women he has done to.... 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Me died and I expressed I felt he was unhappy in our relationship he swears up and send to. Dating my bf in a LTR of healing and reconciliation also gives you the opportunity get. I pulled our phone records and notice there were sending text messages from and... Times we only had sex twice a week later when I ask him stuff, just for the of. Warranted, to feel inadequate husband started out marriage EXACTLY like what described! Put this behind me but it seems it will help you work through your actions the you... In his address book really want to be completely flawless until this weekend passed me, would! Skypeing with that the authorities didnt believe you ; instead they believed lying. Dont want to get intimate not interested to hav sex with her help and dont know Im... Became very suspicious this advice and for responding to all these comments my question whole.... He claimed hed been shopping but didnt buy anything is better to leave me when started... Courage as you make decisions about your marriage has been filled with upheavals.